LIFE IS MESSY - GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION
- Michelle V. Wolf
- Mar 1, 2023
- 7 min read
“I’m taking my freedom, pulling it off the shelf. Putting it on my chain, wearing it ‘round my neck…Livin’ my life like it’s golden.” - Golden, Jill Scott (by the way, if you haven't listened to this song yet, check it out now while reading the rest of this blog!)
What aspect of your life do you keep tucked away high on a shelf? Maybe it’s nestled neatly in a dream box or crumpled between the pages of a well-loved book. Whatever that dream might be, take it out, and let’s review them.
I want you to envision your wildest dreams. Can you see them placed in the palm of your hand? If there were no barriers to success, imagine what it would look and feel like to achieve that dream right now. I want you to give yourself permission not only to dream but to take those initial steps to see your dream come to fruition.
Art heals is a phrase you may have heard before. It’s true; it heals the soul. It lets you get out of your head and tap into your heart. Allow yourself to let go of the expectation of what it “should” look like. It’s time to get dirty. Life is messy. Roll up your sleeves and do the work (she says to herself) - it’s OK to get a little dirt on you or, in this case, paint - allow yourself permission to close your eyes, takeyour hands and slather permanent paint all over them even though you have a brand new manicure - trust the process - you are held and taken care of…” It’ll come off, I say to myself; I think?!?” Lol. That is your mind talking - constantly at you.
When I started EmpowHer, it was important for me to gather some of the top practitioners in their field to allow women to experience; experience themselves, that is - fully stepping into themselves, their talents and gifts not their heads. Five years ago, I partnered with Claudia Concha Art for our first ½ day PowWow retreats in her beautiful Santa Monica Studio. Our goal was to allow women to tap into their most PowWowHerful Selves. We meditated, participated in sound baths, discussed core values, evaluated where each of us was at in our lives, and determined where we might want to go. Discovery if you will. We also immersed ourselves in the most fantastic process called Art Through, allowing one to create and process emotions by closing their eyes and using their non-dominant hand, thereby bypassing our egos, imagine that. Powerful to say the least!
Reflection is an essential process of continued growth, and it was important for me to revisit this activity, continuing to give myself tools to answer some open questions of my own. What is next? And realign with my Why? Again, clearly giving myself permission to process, learn and grow. I love to encourage each of us to continue to walk through life, exploring, striving to be open and evolve. Anything evolving is growing; side note I like to work with practitioners I clearly see are doing the work (P.S. No one has it all figured out, and if they tell you they do, RUN!).
Another full circle moment recently was participating in a workshop on self-love at Suze Yalof Shwartz’s Unplug (where I too held workshops) with Shayna Hiller, a woman said, "personal growth is painful." People don’t speak enough to the pain of growing, and it’s true many people just state things matter-of-factly like it’s part of a task list, but self-care and growth are not easy. There is a reason for the term “growing pains.”
All experts tout that success is created by being clear, consistency and commitment, which I fully agree with. I have always been committed to what I take on, whether an exercise routine, friendship, a new business or a more specific outcome was building my social media community on Instagram. This passion helps drive me and contributed to my success - a goal getter I am! One of the things I vowed to do this year is to live my life to the fullest, not to stop myself but also to give myself permission to gain perspective and find what’s is, next or more balance in my life. It’s important to make space for what you want and realize that your goals or evolution are on your timeframe and no one else's. As women, and people in general, we’re set out into this world with certain expectations. We are told that we must act in a certain way to get the job that will launch us into a stable life. We’re expected to have the perfect family while staying fit and healthy. Our time is preoccupied with conforming to the latest beauty standard and thinking about our children's future. But for most of us, there’s always a little piece of us that gets lost in the chaos of just trying to survive.
Energy is an exchange. I cannot put energy into one task without taking energy away from something else. People often ask how I accomplish all I set out to do in a day and I will say without fail, if I did not have daily rituals, structure, a schedule and routine that I deemed I could not. Perhaps one reason I recognize the gift of permission is how I’ve been received and that I have evaluated my energetic blockers with the assessment tool I work with through my collaboration with Sarah Deane’s MEvolution. I work very closely with my coaching clients on where are they investing their time and mental blocks as one means of developing their successful outcomes. I too must adopt these proven processes to evaluate how I will achieve my dreams and goals. One thing became clear to me, for now I am permitting myself to be less rigid and instead explore the opportunity of flow in the world of content development with my social platforms. As a Solopreneur, I want to invest my energy in other areas that feed my soul and productivity. We know that social media is a time monger and animal. In fact, we discussed in last months blog how Control is a Facade. There are no guarantees no matter what! Oh wow. Who am I? Living Outside my "rules." The marketer in me says one thing and the coach in me says explore - be free. "Livin Your Life Like It's Golden." Dust off the dream journal and take the first step in caring for your inner self. Permit yourself to give in to your whims! I’m talking about starting the first chapter of that book you’ve been meaning to write for the last decade. Or maybe it’s creating the logo for that business endeavor you’ve intended to start. Hey! It could even be something as simple as marking your calendar for that spa day you so desperately want. Whatever it is, give yourself permission to say yes! I want to leave you with the term we all know and love, YOLO. By the way, do people still use that term? Anyway, I mean it. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE, and life is for living, not waiting! Sure, it can be risky to follow your dreams, but so is crossing the street, making a new friend, and trying a new restaurant. You can do it, and I’m here to support you. Life and time are so fragile. I used to think that I had an abundance of time (still do really ;)) - We can't allow ourselves to think, I'll get to my dreams when I have more time. I want us to permit ourselves to follow our dreams NOW. Start small, and take the steps. I’ll be here to guide you through every turn. I leave you with this important question - What does it mean to truly be free and Live Your Life Like It's Golden? And once you have that question answered, don't wait Go do it! Choose to Live Your Life Like It's Golden!
Be well. Do well. All my best,
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